Celebrities like to expand their celebrity-ness. If they’re already famous then they want their own clothing line and a scent in a tacky bottle just for emphasis, so they may as well be presidents too, right?
There’s no fear of this one making awful remarks about ‘grabbing someone by the pussy’ because she is quite the advocate for taking control of her own body and doing this to herself. And if she doesn’t get her way in the senate there’s nothing a foam finger and a twerk won’t solve. Forget freeing the likes of Chelsea Manning this woman will be freeing nipples for all and installing a wrecking ball into the White House.
The White House would get very crowded and he’d be the only man to have first ladies. The number of Playboy Bunnies at his inauguration would be quite the sight. And it would be a great for someone to finally stand up for what’s truly important and that’s wearing pyjamas for most of your life.
A Snoop presidency would be incredibly chilled, thanks to his one and only policy of legalising marijuana in every state in America. I pledge of allegiance to the flagizzle of the Unizzle States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nationizzle under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
How wonderful would America be? He’d be fantastic at interacting with the public, big smiles, silly songs and just a genuine guy leading the country. He could do his speeches as Woody or Forrest Gump and make the nation fall a little bit in love, giving the doubters hope like a phone call in Sleepless in Seattle. But I’d be a little concerned about which countries he creates alliances with, considering his not so favourable travelling history.
Her presidency would not run without the entire K clan by her side and Kanye’s clothing line would be up on the White House website, so every single state can be dressed in holey clothes because #fashion. And of course Kim would insist on her portrait being full length to showcase her sizeable bottom. There would also be ample opportunity for memorabilia. War? World is ending? Political crisis? A selfie at each moment will be available to represent these historical moments.
Let’s be honest, no one would give a shit what he says or what his policies are because every word that comes out of this man’s mouth sounds like a dream, full of inspiration and hope. He could tell the whole world “I’m going to push that nuclear button” and everything would sound like a good idea.
There would be Ciroc on the table and it would never run out – another one – this would make American politics incredibly interesting as he banishes ‘they’ and continues to spread his keys to success. Top secret information would be all over Snapchat and he would be filling the nation with confidence because “you smart.”
Ladies, let’s get in formation. Beyoncé wouldn’t take any shit and her whole time at the White House would be an incredible show with a dance routine to fight all political battles. She could even sing the national anthem as a one woman show, now that’s cool. In summary, she would be a boss ass bitch and a great album could come from this.
Bitches will not be able to snake during his presidency, no fakery will be around, this guy will have shit on the CIA. He would do the greater good for love and make sure no one got catfished. And of course with Max by his side creating the next Biden and Obama duo.
This businessman would openly express it’s alright to think your daughter is hot, excuse the rights of women and the LGBT+ community, act in a completely racist manner, talk weird shit about walls and act like being a president is like a series of The Apprentice and live tweet the whole thing.